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Field Report: an online program
participant, shares her results from a nature-connecting activity.
A HUMMINGBIRD READS MY HEART
Yesterday morning, my authority
overrun thoughts were singing an old, familiar though not very
inspiring tune. "There is not enough time. There is not
enough money. There is not enough energy. There is not enough
me.
In an effort to center myself,
I had paused to read and contemplate from Stephen Mitchell's
interpretation of the Tao te Ching.
"All things are born of
being.
Being is born of non-being.
.....-Lao-tzu
The meaning of these words
somewhat eluded me. But I sensed that understanding them was
important for me. At this point in my life, I wanted nothing
more than the ability to just "be, and feel that in my being,
I am living my life in accord with what matters. So, I asked,
with a great desire to know, "How is 'being' born of non-being?
Later in the day, I had just
returned from taking my daughter to her violin lesson. It had
been raining all morning. I consciously decided to pause before
entering the house to have a PNC moment. I stood at the edge
of the garage looking out at the sky's waterfall. It was then,
that I heard a familiar sound- "Vvvvvvp.
A couple of years ago, the
hummingbird and I began to form a close relationship. He or she
always seems to show up in extraordinary ways at the times when
I need guidance or reassurance the most.
"I hear you, I said. But,
I don't see you.
"VVVVVVVVp! the answer
came.
I looked in the direction of
the sound, but still no sign of the hummingbird. I hoped that
if I stood still enough, I would catch sight of the little fellow.
Then suddenly, with a flash
of iridescent green and a splash of apple red- about fifteen
feet from where I was standing there he was.
I was so delighted to see him,
that at first I forgot to thankfully ask permission to do the
activity with him. But, I did remember to raise my finger frame
camera and take a few snapshots.
I was immediately struck by
his focus. In amongst my coral bells, he moved with such grace
and intention. From blossom to blossom he went, gathering nectar.
He seemed almost oblivious of the fact that his wings were moving
at about five hundred miles per hour. He also seemed to be oblivious
to something else.
I recently was told by a beekeeper
that the world's food supply is primarily pollinated by three
beings: bumble bees, honey bees, and hummingbirds.
Yet, in performing his daily
routine, the hummingbird seems unconscious of the blessing he
is to the rest of us. He doesn,t expect any awards, scholarships
or pay raises. He just does what needs doing to care for himself
and his family And the world is fed.
It seemed that the hummingbird
had arrived to help me discover an answer to my morning's question,
"How is 'being' born of non-being?
Indeed, in that moment the
hummingbird seemed to capture the essence of non-being.
Nothing to prove.
No desire for credit.
No expectation of appreciation.
Just "being- born of non-being.
I began to recognize where
I tend to get hung up. My life can become so fueled by my fears.
There is not enough time, because
I am afraid that if I don't prove that I can do everything perfectly,
I will no longer be loved.
There is not enough money, because I am afraid of losing the
credit/prestige that money brings.
There is not enough energy, because I am afraid that if I don't
scramble to stay on top of it all- I will be unappreciated or
even worse-
rejected.
There is not enough me. Infact,
sometimes it seems that I don't even know me. I just know the
thing that my fears tell me I have to prove myself to be.
So, little fellow, I look to
you to help me release my fears. Help me learn non-being, so
that "being can be born in me.
Suddenly the hummingbird darted
to a set of coral bells about five feet from where I was standing,
I wondered if, and hoped that,
he might approach even closer to do his work in the coral bells
that were by my feet. And then- as if reading my mind there he
was.
What wonder! What grace! He
was directly below my nose. I sensed that he was giving me permission
to do the activity with him, & subtly reminding me that I
had forgotten to ask for permission.
I did so.
And then, I asked him to teach
me of "non-being & "being.
"What do you need? he
seemed to ask. "What do you need to receive- to simply care
for yourself and your family?
I smiled at the simplicity
of it all. I began to sense that all things would be taken care
of just as they needed to be- if I would just be willing to trust
my ability to care.
Lao-tzu says it this way:
Open yourself to the Tao,
Then trust your natural response;
And everything will fall into place.
This was no small realization
for me. The truth of it reverberated in my spirit- placed there
by the beating vibration of hummingbird wings?
Now, it was my turn to be oblivious.
The rain was splattering down on my bowed head, but I was still.
In the quiet, the hummingbird's wings disappeared. All that was
to be seen or felt was the stillness of his body, and the power
of his intention.
Gratitude filled my being.
The hummingbird and I breathed
as one- in and out...in and out.
"So, perhaps, I mused
"This is me. .
"Thank you, dear little
fellow, for helping me release my fears. Thank you for helping
me to just be.
"There must be the generating
force of Love behind every effort that is to be successful."
.....-Henry Danid Thoreau
"The activities enable
Nameless Intelligent Attraction Love to embrace itself in you
and instantly bring the presence of Nature's essence into your
life.
.....-Reconnecting With Nature
For me, the hummingbird bore
witness to the truth of these statements.
I can fly only when my focus
is love. I can accomplish only when my mind is still. I am the
hummingbird. I just forgot for a while.
When I stop to realize that
if I hadn't taken the time to pause and look out at the rain
with gratitude- I never would have had this beautiful interaction
with the hummingbird. I would have been in the house while he
was in my coral bells. I am grateful that I didn't allow this
moment to be taken away from me- by my hurried wrangled thoughts.
It saddens me to think that I could have missed it.
This activity definitely enhanced
my self esteem in a huuuuuge way. How can I hang out with a hummingbird
and not get the grandness in all of creation including myself.
Part of me that was re-educated,
my trust in the fact that there is an abundance of time, money,
energy, and me. Not out there somewhere in the future- only in
now.
The key is in trusting the love that I am.
I am a person who receives
good feelings by being quiet in nature.
Act now.
Master Organic
Psychology by doing it.
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Contact us at 360-378-6313 mailto:nature@interisland.net,
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